Balance During the Holiday Season

In this month of profound giving and celebration, I am struck by how many clients I see pushing themselves to the point of collapse, in order to make the holiday “all that it can be” for their loved ones. And while their motivations are fundamentally pure and selfless, their generosity is all too often at their own expense.

It’s not limited to the holidays either; some people make this their “default setting” year-round. Most of them don’t even know they’re doing it – if you ask them, they’ll usually say that this sense of “drive” is a “lifestyle choice.” To be frank, I see this most often in women, particularly those with people-pleasing and overachieving personalities.

The result of this overachieving, relentless “do, do, doing” is that neither the person nor their loved ones get the full benefit of these kind gestures. Eventually, the striving to achieve takes its toll on the whole family. Sadly, no one wins when this happens – least of all the person doing the “giving.”

What’s the solution? The short answer: balance. (more…)